Oh the married life..

So we're married! And boy my ass is sore!

Nobody give me alcohol. EVER. See I'm a lightweight. 5'2" and just over 100lbs and rarely drink anything. So one and a half Mike's later and I'm trashed. Seriously. I barely remember last night. That wasn't our wedding night mind you. I'm 19 and though promised, nobody bothered to bring me any alcohol for our wedding night and David had already been drinking too much to take me to get some. Can I turn 21 already?

Maybe that'd be bad. More access to alcohol is not what I need. I don't know what all I did last night but I do remember feeling strangely brave and testing every last thing he said.

I recall one incident quite well. He hates when I hit him. I can't hit hard and it usually just tickles him which is infuriating to me. Seriously! I'm mad at you over here and you're giggling like a 13 year old girl! Ugh! But usually I'm just trying to pester him anyway as I was last night so I didn't care if it hurt or not. I was barely tapping him in my drunken state but a rule's a rule and he's become quite consistent in the past couple weeks. I hit his leg 20 times all the while laughing to myself. When I was finished he said "Alright honey, you've had your fun, now that's enough." I apparently took it as a challenge. Who gave me this alcohol anyway? I started again. Nearing 10 he told me to "Knock it off" in no uncertain HoHy terms. I ignored. At 17 I paused as he finished saying "If you reach 20, then I reach 20." Knowing what that means I didn't wish to hit 20...but I did wish to hit 19. Apparently that was close enough. I got 20 with the stupid flyswatter.

Thats the only one I clearly remember but I got it a lot last night. I know that for sure. I guess because it didn't hurt so bad I thought it a good time to push limits. I failed to think about this morning when I would wake up with a very sore rump. Stupid, stupid me...


Also, the week leading up to our wedding was interesting. We were staying at my parents' house and they know nothing of DD. Well I tried starting an explanation to my mom with little eases into it, but when she got all annoyed at him giving me an 11pm off the phone rule, even with a funny story attached, (It's different if it vibrates though right?) I thought it best to not venture into any further explanations. So that left us with no real way to go about our lifestyle. And I took full advantage. Which pissed off David to the point that he FOUND a way to punish me. We simply went to the garage for spanking in the middle of the night. And I don't know what my problem was but I COULD NOT SIT STILL. I was literally terrified and I don't know why at all. There was nothing to be scared of. He was barely spanking me because he was worried about sound and there I was trembling and sobbing. I didn't feel it at all 2 minutes later. He had to stop and try to put me back in position time and time again and to attempt to console me when he realized just how scared I was.

So that led to 2 days before our wedding getting the question: Do you not want DD in our marriage?

What?

Of course I do! It works wonders for us!

He agreed and said he doesn't want it to go away because he feels it keeps our love strong but that he didn't understand my reactions to the 2 spankings at my parents.

I didn't either. I still don't. What's wrong with me?

The car ride home after the wedding was rough too. Well really just the last few hours. It was a long drive okay! Ha. And the next morning I paid for it. And once again freaked.

He decided it's just because we've been away from it for too long since we're used to maintenance every other day. We started that back up again and despite my bratty attitude...the freak outs have stopped. But I guess even a week of near freedom put me into some sort of funk because I've been testing everything and can't seem to get myself to stop.

I feel dumb. I'm not thinking before I act at all. I seldom do but I'm so much worse right now.

And it's not helping that I'm getting constant UTI's and can't do anything about them until we get the paperwork filled out so I can get on military insurance. And it's rotation. And it's not happening any time soon. It took a week for the stupid marriage license to get here and now it's rotation.

OMG.

Okay I need a nap.
I'm done rambling.

Toodles
Ash