But officer, perhaps you didn't see my age?

As children we accepted rules and consequences as just a part of life. If you threw a tantrum as a toddler you may have been placed in time out. If you ignored curfew as a teenager you may have been grounded or perhaps lost the privileges to your car for a time. But we all live by rules do we not? The Bible states ten of them for everyone to abide by for their entire lives. No one is exempt regardless of how they feel about said rules. There are laws we all must consider in our day to day lives from speed limits to killing. We do not outgrow a need for rules and standards. We do not age beyond the need to accept them either. “But officer, perhaps you didn’t see. I’m actually 37, that seat belt law doesn’t apply to me.” You can try it, but it will not work. “But Your Honor, you must have missed that I’m 25 now so you needn’t punish me for killing that man.” These sound silly, do they not? We may not live in perfect peace and harmony, but what a world we’d live in if not for rules and standards to distinguish between right and wrong. And how worse off would we be with no system of consequences for not following them.

So then is it so ridiculous a thought to allow your partner in life, the one wants nothing short of the best for you, to create rules for you within your relationship for your own safety and wellbeing as well as for the wellbeing of your relationship with them? Of course there already are a few placed by society such as not cheating on your spouse. And would you think it wrong of him to punish you by leaving you if you were to do such a thing? Without consequence you’d learn it was acceptable to do repeatedly. It’s common practice to punish your spouse in this way for such an act. Without this rule and without this consequence the very foundation of the relationship is shaky and it poses risks for the future of the relationship. But what about smaller crimes? Is it safe to say that there are differences from couple to couple? That for one it might mean nothing to keep a kitchen full of unwashed dishes, but for another it could be a crack in the relationship’s foundation? I believe so. And if that’s the case is it more damaging to impose a rule stating that the dishes are to be washed after mealtime or to ignore it and the crack grow larger over time? And of course cops don’t let minor speeding infractions go unnoticed simply because it’s not a large enough crime to take you to jail and so is the same with minor infractions within a marriage. You wouldn’t leave your spouse because she failed to clean up the dishes after dinner one night. So what are you to do?

As we’ve decided, we don’t outgrow the need for rules and consequences. And just as laws and punishments are created to keep peace and harmony in a larger fashion, rules and punishments should be used within a marriage. So referring to those dishes: You can’t very well put your spouse in jail for such a thing nor would it make any sense to charge them like a speeding ticket. That’s both of yours’ money. Are you going to take money from yourself to punish your spouse? I think not. So what exactly are you to do? You cannot do anything without a blanket consent but with that you can use more traditional methods.

So we don’t want a crack in our foundation so we don’t want small crimes to go unnoticed. One option is to then spank the wife who didn’t do the dishes as told. “Spanking? You’re kidding? That’s for naughty children!” Didn’t we just decide that we don’t outgrow our need for consequences? And are you aware of the benefits of spanking a woman? Disregarding the relationship benefits we’ll focus on those for just the woman. It sets our hormones back in balance. We often get cranky during PMS and a spanking will knock you right out of that mode. It eases cramps and relieves stress. It gives a feeling of protection and love as well as forgiveness for whatever crime we committed. It can help with the treatment of anxiety and depression and simply get you back about your senses.

Now for the relationship benefits: It gives you both a sense of closeness and connection. It gives a clean slate and with a painful reminder to do as told the wife then thinks twice about not doing those dishes thus keeping that crack from growing. There are of course other options such as corner time and such for more minor infractions. This lifestyle opens up the lines of communication and brings about a closeness that can’t be denied. You each have your roles within the relationship and they are defined. There is no power struggle. And of course the benefits to the man are that that he feels respected and thus becomes more respectful towards his wife. Would you consider it demeaning for a husband to expect that his wife not text and drive? She could be seriously injured or killed! Would it then be best to sit and let anger drive you with nothing to do about it if she decides to ignore a rule that could save her life? Or would it be better to spank her and hold her after, letting her know that it’s wrong and that it’s wrong because you love her and care about her safety. And as a wife, would you respect the husband that wasn’t concerned enough about your safety to intervene when you are doing something possibly dangerous?

Of course, there’s much more to the lifestyle that I haven’t went about explaining but the point being that we don’t age beyond the need to feel the protection that rules and consequences provide so why is it such a crazy idea for a husband to have rules for his wife that keep her safe and healthy and their relationship stable and happy?

Rules and consequences: we all have them whether they are laws and penalties put upon us by the police and justice system or commandments from the Bible or even punishments doled out by a boss at work. When did marriages become exempt from rules that create peace? I don’t know about you but I’d rather take a spanking than crack the foundation of my marriage.

And you can have that with domestic discipline. Not so crazy after all, huh?

This is simply something I decided to write in defense of DD. I hate hearing that as wives, we should be too old to be punished and having our relationships compared to that of a parent/child relationship. I suppose it does no good on a DD blog connected with only other DD blogs but this is the only place I really have to put it besides sitting on my hard drive. I would love to hear what you all think of it and constructive criticism is welcomed and encouraged. 

Ash